Definition of Loss
He is six and loss is defined when he cannot find his Minecraft t-shirt or he forgot he drank all the milk in his cup or there are no more chips in the bowl or his favourite book is not on the shelf. The loss of his father lacks definition. He knows it is his mother’s tears, Nanna’s cuddles and Grandpa’s silence.
In the playroom he takes blank paper from the open ream and the pencil case of Textas, sits at the drawing desk and draws as many pictures of his father as he can. Stick figures with round bodies and funny shaped heads wearing tradie fluoroes or boardies and rashie or jeans and a t-shirt walking the dog. In the open spaces he draws a hammer, tape measure, saw, drill, as many items as he can remember from the tool box on the back of the ute.
From the craft drawer he takes out a pair of scissors and a roll of sticky tape, takes them to his room with the pictures. He cuts the pictures out one-by-one and sticks them on his bedroom window in a stained glass mosaic. The definition of what he has lost.
A Fullness in Brevity - Adam Byatt 